People judge others who break up someone's marriage or a relationship. As a rule, they are accused of ruthless selfishness, preying on the weak moment of someone’s relationship. But let us ask the question, how many relationships that were broken up by a third party were actually happy? Logic dictates to think that if people are happy, fulfilled and have a true connection with each other, none of the partners would seek solace in the arms of a stranger. In that case – maybe sometimes, breaking up a bad relationship, or an unhappy marriage is not as bad as the world perceives it? Bien Magazine looks into this matter.
Together for the sake of children
This is a hypocrisy and cruelty - the adults, people who openly hate each other, constantly arguing, state that they must be together because of the children. Children, unfortunately, suffer the most in such situations, because they are hurt every day by their parents. They learn that a relationship is a range of afflictions, quarrels about nothing and very negative emotions. An infinite number of children raised in unhappy families, where adults are at each other’s throats, will create in their adulthood a similar, equally unhappy relationship.
So - in many cases parents' divorce or separation would be for children a less traumatic experience than the daily torment.
A third person enters a bad relationship
Many times it happens that in the life of one of the anguished spouses appear a third person who they are able to love. It would seem that the continuation is obvious - divorce, remarriage and, quite possibly, a happy life and better future. Unfortunately, society and customs dictate not to end marriages. It does not matter whether this relationship has burned out a long time ago, whether it is a continuous war. It is important to continue, because it creates a family. It is an extremely archaic and unfair view, with which, unfortunately, many cannot cope. It is difficult to demand from young, sometimes even very young people that on the date of making marriage vows they were confident they will manage to spend a whole life together.
The third often withdraws
Unfortunately, it often happens that the third person renounces their happiness, or happiness of their partner who could get a divorce for the sake of their children. It is maintained that children need to have a complete family. Who really gains and who loses out on that arrangement? Everyone loses and no one wins. Potentially happy future couples will not have the chance to see whether their feelings survive (and perhaps it would have survived because people are adults and more consciously form a relationship), the children will continue in a nightmare, learning completely ridiculous reflexes, evasions, lies, or even atrocities. Also a person who is "cheated on" because they could seize the moment and regain freedom and seek happiness with someone else.
Such situations are always very difficult, but it is worth thoroughly examining the balance of gains and losses.
Author: Bien Magazine